FCA opens fintechno nightclub
The Financial Conduct Authority (FCA) has entered the nightclub space with the launch of a hot new clubbing spot specialising in fintechno beats.
Titled ‘The Finedance Sector’, the club already has a long waiting list with some revellers waiting up to two years to get in.
Once in, several guests complained that the cost of entry, drinks and sundries had emptied their wallets, forcing them to leave early and dance to their own tunes instead.
“Typical London prices,” said one attendee. “I don’t know why they opened the nightclub in London when everyone knows some of the biggest fintechno artists are based outside the capital.”
Controversy has also surrounded the club’s dress code, with ‘alternative’ patrons being told that their mere presence created a “high risk” to members.
While an FCA spokesperson explained the reasoning behind their high-risk categorisation, revellers spotted Elon Musk, Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian leaving the club with a sack full of stolen wallets.
The FCA has since opened a consultation into the club’s operations, admittance criteria, risk categorisation, management, staffing concerns, diversity goals, and value for money. A consultation into the consultation is expected to follow.
When approached for comment, an FCA spokesperson downed several shots of tequila and announced that they were going on strike.